Top Ten Complaints From Dogs

Top Ten Complaints From Dogs     '1' Blaming your farts on me..... Not funny... Not funny at all! -------------------------------------------------- '2' Yelling at me for barking... I'M A DAMN DOG! -------------------------------------------------- '3' Taking me for a walk, then Not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway? -------------------------------------------------- '4' Any trick that involves balancing Food on my nose. Stop it! -------------------------------------------------- '5' Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff Up when you're not home. -------------------------------------------------- '6' The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo what A proud moment for the top of the food chain! -------------------------------------------------- '7' Taking me to the vet for 'the big snip', then acting Surprised when I freak out every time we go back! -------------------------------------------------- '8' Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing Yet. -------------------------------------------------- '9' Dog sweaters. Hello? Haven't you noticed the fur? -------------------------------------------------- '10' How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth. You're just jealous. -------------------------------------------------- Now lay off me on some of these things. We both know who's boss here! You don't see me picking up your poop do you?